Why I do what I do "Rebel"

Rebel Unique Goth

Many people have posed the question to me about why I chose the gothic alternative, rebel lifestyle, what I define as doing things outside society's expectations. Growing up in my generation it was expected that one completes education, chooses a field of profession, marries,  buys a house, then family enters the picture. Most of the people I knew followed that path to some extent. I however, think that there were forces at play guiding me to where I am today since it seems that it was most difficult for me to end up in the traditional family unit. 

Today,  way of life changed because of the internet and people became more in tuned with other options and possibilities to choose, life just took a 360 and changed. Many things that were taboo even to speak of in previous years are now socially acceptable, if I were to elaborate on this point, it's as if the  invention of the internet suddenly turned taboo into norm. Now, if the internet never materialized would life stay the same? Would time, people and technology progress? I see my way of life as evolution, progress. Also, living out experiences as well. 

CriesoftheGoth.com my personal website will be a detailed account of the various aspects of life I have experienced and still exploring. As the name suggests, various facets of my version of goth alternative will be portrayed through my site from fashion to various aspects of photography, book reads and hobbies. 

I like to differentiate myself from the “sheeple”, those who follow society's rules of proper etiquette without knowing the real reason why. The buzz pitch phrases that are regurgitated to the point of nausea like: “everybody is doing it” or “ it's the right thing to do”.  “ This is so cool” 

Much of this is literally being sold to people through famous media stars, who appear perfect with huge amounts of time and money. It's almost like  a subliminal message being transmitted to the general public minds,  if you want success  this is what to follow no matter what life are leading or intend to lead.  

I intend to show that it's possible to achieve goals and follow a lifestyle of your choice by positioning yourself with the right person and attitude. It is important also to see the larger picture of those who support you and not let those who disapprove your choices derail you. One thing I noticed is the ones who make the most noise when against something or someone are in reality the lesser in numbers, but people don't notice this fact, they merely focus their attention on the voices of these few that they hear.  I prefer to concentrate on the positive supporters who when seeing the bigger picture, are more numerous in numbers. That in my opinion is the key to achieving your set goals in life.

Anything can be possible with the right mindset and belief, its just a matter of defining one's own perspective and making it unique and following through to the end without getting distracted. 

I have chosen to elaborate on my unique version of Goth lifestyle and how it evolved and what it means to me and the life decisions  that came to be. 

My Unique Gothic Lifestyle

I don’t follow the “traditional sense” of goth, I make up my own. It is tiresome to me that the word “goth” has to be associated with black lipstick, pale skin, black clothes and certain types of music that reflects this persona. I deem the word goth as living a lifestyle that is not conservative, does not influence others, basically what society would find “weird” or out of the ordinary.  

I do not believe in labels or that if a person defines themselves as a particular genre they can only reflect it based on what society defines that genre to be otherwise it’s wrong.

My lifestyle involved positioning myself together with my boyfriend where we ditched all ties with family and religion so we don’t have to deal with “why are you making us look bad”? This was a choice we made in order to avoid conflict, as we are both firm believers in not forcing our ways on others. We come from very controversial backgrounds and at the time (25years ago)  I never thought that I was doing anything wrong by being with someone who was from a Muslim background while I from a Jewish one, the only people who opposed us strongly was family and people who were entrenched in societies imposed beliefs and traditions. We were never rooted to religious beliefs or traditions and that is part of the reason for our strength that kept us together during some of the challenges we faced, we are proud of our choices.

We did not have children because this lifestyle in our opinion will conflict with that and also we never understood the true reason why kids are so important, let’s face it you give up many freedoms and sacrifices for kids, there is always an image to maintain and people like family, schools to cater to and that is just too much work that never ends, so I would rather spend that time on us. 

The lifestyle I chose to embrace is my version of alternative or goth and outside the box, I do what I do because it is liberating for me and it allows me to choose what I want to project to people. At the same time I do not live a double life by being open about my lifestyle and not ashamed of it as it’s done on my terms.

I have met many people who want to live a certain way, but because of societal pressure, family, jobs they are too fearful to live it openly; so they do it behind closed doors personally this is hypocritical and tiresome, one should embrace one’s true self.  Shame and fear are invented words by society that are used to control people and have them behave in a manner that is suited to it, not the real way a person wants to live. Culture and tradition really have no place in this type of lifestyle in my opinion, that’s the reason family is not in mine and my boyfriend’s life.    

In the city where I grew up and lived most of my life, Montreal where I met my boyfriend, life was mainly about showing off, having money and prestige and looking top notch everywhere you went. The blue collar or poor person unless they defined themselves as that they were treated less favorably due to lack of money.  When you live this life you generally have no time to really enjoy your money, you live to work but, you must maintain the image that you are happy. 

I believe when a person chooses a lifestyle they have to take what comes with it, and generally people like to cherry pick only the good; this is a road to failure and we did that exactly.

Since moving from Montreal where my lifestyle changed to a more blue collar type, again by choice not force; I have found it to be an adjustment but an experience that turned positive.  One has to set a goal and work towards it, distractions will come that’s where the discipline kicks in and with time and dedication the goal is achieved.  

Tattoos are an integral part of my lifestyle and they are work in progress, they are an extension and expression of my evolution from the person I was to what I have become. These tattoos were carefully chosen with deep profound meanings.

 

I post a lot of stuff on social media but that is not a reflection of me and what I am about, I am simply a girl with her long term boyfriend living and exploring life and blogging it.