Why Are You Here?

As the title suggests, I am writing this article for those who come to profiles and engage in DM or comments with the creator only to force their negative opinion on them. Profiles are written for a reason,  that is to explain what the person is all about, what they are looking for and NOT looking for from others. It is uncanny to me that people message blindly without reading carefully, they read to validate what they have in their head about the creator, not what is actually written and the true meaning the creator is  trying to convey. 

There are three things I will be addressing in this article,  first sending DM's, commenting on profiles of people that have nothing in common with you, you don't like but feel the need to share your needless usually negative unwanted opinion, second the indoctrinated by society that all women slobber over dick pix. and lastly findom bashing which I see on here alot.  I have written an article about this before, but I feel the need to expand on this topic in more detail. 

I am a lesbian (MEANS NO STRAIGHT BOYS, NO BOYS/MEN) Mistress, which I write in my profile and in the sexual orientation section, yet for some peculiar odd weird reason I get messages from male dom's, and general dick wielding male idiots who think that they can convert me as soon as I see their dick picture, or read about their bull stamina, let me say outright "NOT INTERESTED" women DO NOT slobber over a dick unless they are being paid for it. 

Yes, I have onlyfans, I am a content creator and I get paid for it, no lies or anything hidden about that, there are many women doing this. I am not the only one. I appreciate those who like my content, are into me and I have met some cool people, as well I do have loyal fans. 

Just because you see content where dick is involved does not mean it was enjoyable, pleasurable it was simply to satisfy a partner or money, actors  being paid to create content. Why is it that what you see you believe literally to the letter? If you say well how do you know until you try? What if you like it? Read the example below, yes, it is extreme but it proves a point. 

**Example: what if I took a piece of bread and smeared dog shit on it (yes actual shit, poop, doodie,  (no offense to those into that fetish) soaked it with dog piss, then took some mud from the street and added that on top. Then I send you a picture and say do you like this? try to eat it.** That to me is dick pix and males saying looking at my hard dick will make your legs shake, my cum is gold, my cock is supreme.

First, sending a dick picture to random women without reading their profile is simply moronic, it makes you stupid and brainless. The idea that the sight of a male dick will drive any woman wild as indoctrinated by society and somehow having a 10 inch penis makes you an alpha, and you can satisfy a woman the best BULLSHIT indoctrinated by society! I have yet to see one successful REAL TRUE positive outcome, where when sent the dick pic the chick automatically turned over the earth just to meet you, and worship your dick.  Not every woman shares that viewpoint! As a Mistress I laugh at penis no matter the size, to me its purpose is pissing, maybe dribbling then locking it up and covering it up. 

**Findom Bashing**  

I have read extensive comment posts in various groups and on profiles of fetishists that are subs/slaves but write that they will not pay a domme and this is about lifestyle and passion for BDSM. I also saw a play on the word  "no findum" . Some of these people when they see a findomme, they automatically comment negatively by saying things like "get a job" ;" I will not pay to play". No one is forcing you to pay anyone, that is why profiles are written to explain what each person is about; do some reading. Findoms exist because there are those who seek them. If jobs paid well then MAYBE time could be spared to do this as a hobby. If you are seeking a free service go to the dommes who offer free service and leave the rest alone. 

I have heard stories where subs paid a random domme online that they thought was legit, they were promised an amazing session, they heard what they wanted to hear and ended up losing money and getting scammed. Yes, that does exist but it is NOT every domme. 

Another story I heard, was the domme was real, but she spammed the shit out of the sub by messaging daily asking when will the next session be taking place, and the session was rushed and not professionally conducted, just barking orders and insults to the sub, this is not what being a domme is about. 

Here are some pointers: first don't fall for gimmicks and too good to be true promises that don't seem real or they model domme is after quick money. 

It can be quite daunting to trust the right person, anonymity is a major aspect to some subs as they are not out of the closet about their kinks and fetishes. Insecurity and shame are an immense part of some subs mind, they spiral in and out of the urge to be dominated which is difficult to control. I read that some dommes push the subs limits and go overboard into what they are willing to do during play, the sub complies for a time because they feel there is no other alternative.. Don't get twisted, subs who want to will eventually look, follow, friend other dommes behind the back of their domme/Mistress , and at some points even end servitude with their Mistress. 

Here are few things to look for when researching a Domme/Mistress: 

- Do they have long-term social media profiles that extend over 5 years, there should be normal or vanilla pix of the Mistress in her daily life. I.E. Instagram, Facebook this demonstrates a personality outside the lifestyle making her a real human being with substance not just mindless mainstream that is oversaturated on social media.  

- Age plays a major factor, older experienced Dommes/Mistress will be more mature and understanding and they are familiar with the sub mindset, some have actually done some of the fetishes themselves ( I am one of those) so they know the right method to use on the sub this results in a more long-term relationship.

Intelligent writings are written in an articulate manner about the lifestyle, and about the Domme/Mistress herself 

- She should have a concise and easy to understand structure for subs: 

  - pricing 

  - duration of session 

  - method of payment (onlyfans for instance) 

  - what will take place during session make it clear that this is NOT about sex 

  - toys that will be used 

  - agree on type of session real life or online 

~~**What fetishes/kinks do you practice**~~  

- Real life or online 

- Have a method to reassure subs for anonymity that what is done in sessions is kept confidential for those who are not out of the closet and need to remain private because of family, job and other factors. Remember, not everyone is positioned for this lifestyle, they could be single, but mentally they need to accept who they are and what they are doing, they need not to feel ashamed of their fetishes. 

- have a verbal  conversation with your Domme/Mistress  assess personality, will you be comfortable, will this be one time or long term servitude. For one time servitude, most of this may not apply but it helps to avoid problems like unwanted blackmail or losing money from scammers. 

- Safety should be an integral part of the play, BDSM is NOT about torture at least that is my opinion. 

- Be open to ideas of fetish and kink play

In conclusion, not all Findom is bad or scams. proper research needs to be done by the sub if you are into that idea. If you want to play for free go seek it, it may or may not turn out positive but for fuck sake stop bashing findoms. We post in the appropriate groups and there are those who will seek us be it one time or long term. Findom does not mean gold digger, it means being paid for the time allotted to a session with a sub. No more. 

As for the dick pix, READ profiles don't randomly send them to anyone you will most likely be ignored. If you are looking for casual sex, one night stands do the same. 

I am not bashing or dissing anyone, I am just stating my perspective in a writing on my own profile. 

Mistress K