Domination and Submission (Mistress K Perspective)
A draft version for thoughts
I was first introduced to BDSM at a fetish ball in my town over a decade ago, and it was intriguing to say the least. I had little knowledge of how the dynamic worked between dom and sub/slave. There was an area in the club setup as a dungeon and it was explained to me that slaves were all on the floor wearing restraints and various attire like collars, masks to show their role. Dom’s were beside them ensuring their obedience and servitude.
I have since adopted the role of Mistress which I think suits me well. I have learned a great deal of knowledge of the mind of a submissive man specifically (I have not worked with females), which to me is not just a sexual fetish to “get off” but rather a way of giving up control of their sexuality to another person a Mistress or Dominant who will decide how and when to do which fetish.
We label these submissive males as sissies, their manhood is gone, non-existent (small penis humiliation) and this makes some feel vulnerable, ashamed and in a sense losers that they are beta men that cannot satisfy a woman sexually like an alpha male.
In order to be a successful dominant, one must have the personality of a Domme, not just bark orders randomly and expect servitude, this means nothing and does not make a true Domme; assertiveness, structure is an essential part of the Domme role, hence I developed a website that acts as a system or process to filter out time wasters, fakes.
This website I called https://subservients.club/coven which I designed as an intricate form of understanding each sub/slave applicant or prospect.
For this reason I do not meet random strangers online asking to meet even for coffee. I do not know them, I have not established any form of relationship, they are simply strangers. People today are after something sinister or not. One needs consistent actions and extensive time.
The idea to satisfy every sub/slave is difficult, each one has their own fantasy in their mind of how they want their fetish to be played out for them.
Also, fetish does not just mean pain, and suffering, immobility with the use of restraints and chaining to a wall. There are everyday gestures, certain bodyparts like feet, armpits, legs that turn on subs/slaves. The fantasy of being turned into a woman or sissification making a character they sub built in their mind come to life.
In some respects, this may be viewed as humiliating as the slave loses any degree of “manhood” they may have.
As a Mistress, it is important to develop a dynamic with your sub/slave to ensure what the limits are, safe words, and what type of play they enjoy and don’t enjoy. Of course trying out new ideas for fetishes and seeing how they turn out should be mutually discussed. The Domme can decide what play will be acted out in the session.
Subs/Slaves need to be reassured of confidentiality and discretion, this is something that seems unanimous among them, the idea that a family member, work colleague or friend should ever find out they are seeing a Domiantrix/Mistress is quite embarrassing and shameful.
One can say, I heard of all the fetishes “NO YOU HAVE NOT” A true Domme learns everyday from subs/slaves, this is an experience not about being a know it all.
I believe in understanding, communication with slaves/subs before starting play, a trust has to be established over time and consistent actions, trust between a Domme and Sub/Slave should be earned if it is a long term relationship. Subs/slaves need to feel at ease when communicating with their respective Dommes, not tell them what they think the Domme wants to hear.
If it is something that a sub/slave wants to try once they usually go online to adult cam sites then it becomes finding the right cam model to do the fetish, once it is done, it is over and the next time will most likely be with someone else.
In conclusion, understand the submissive mind, then the fetishes a trust needs to be established. This takes time and work. Many discussions will happen and should after each session to ensure play was enjoyable. No sense in doing something you hate. As for those seeking random meetups, unless I know you and have actually spoken online for some time, the only way I might consider meeting you is in a public setting of my choosing where I have friends with me and you can just show up.
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